How do I gain what was lost in winter?
ABOUT. Protocol, Utility, Barnes etc. 25M. Not white, not American. Subsystem in a diagnosed (C-)DID system. Trying to reintegrate myself back into society. Resocialize, too; I'm kind of a beaten stray dog. See readme.txt for more.
I'm in another world and not in control of myself at all. I feel like throwing up. I would do anything he tells me to do. I want to please him and also to murder him. I need to be obedient to him and make him laugh and smile and feel pleasure. I want him to be proud of me. I want him to think that I'm clever. I want him to think that I'm sexy. And I want to savagely mutilate his body and feed his corpse to dogs. (Anonymous, The Incest Diary.)
